Faith

I've had a lot on my mind lately. It has to do with faith, and building my life on a sure foundation, which is Christ.

One of my dear cousins has decided that the Church is no longer true, and wants nothing to do with it. I guess I'm just having a hard time seeing how someone who I thought was SO strong, could fall so hard, so fast!

The last year of her life has been pretty traumatic. She's had a best friend commit suicide. I don't know if it started before his death, but she took it REALLY hard.

I guess when people are in shock, and don't know what to say, they can say some really stupid things. She was told over and over that her friend wouldn't be judged because of the state of mind he was in, but then she was told he'd go to Hell for some of the other bad choices he'd made.

My problem HERE is, no one is in any place where they can honestly judge this poor kid. NO ONE!! Not me, not his parents, not even his friends. God is the only one that I know of, who knows this young man's heart and mind so thoroughly, that HE can know what was really going on.

Anyway, she's had a bumpy road, and I just worry about her.

I know for ME that I would be spiraling out of control in a pit of depression, worldliness, and fear, hurt, and anger WITHOUT the gospel in MY life. My knowledge of the truthfulness of this Church, sometimes, is the ONLY thing that gets me through a rotten day. THE ONLY THING! I know that with God's help, that I can fix the mistakes I've made, and work harder at being the person I hope to become.
And I know WITHOUT a DOUBT that where I am, what I'm doing, and who I'm trying to be is in alliance with God's plan. I KNOW it. Nothing anyone around me will say can change my mind. I know!

Where did I get such a sure knowledge?? From my faith. My belief that things in my life are directly from God. Noticing the little things around me that I consider miracles. The budding of a flower. A beautiful sunset. A bird in flight. My son, picking up a new concept that has previously been hard for him. The love I feel for my husband. The love I feel FROM my Father. There are SO many things that I see that let me know that God truly is mindful of me.

I ache because my cousin no longer has the whole picture in front of her. I hope and pray for her constantly. I wish that someday, she will come back, and know, as I do, that her foundation can get her through ANYTHING.

I've been wondering, if everyone around me, my husband, my parents, my siblings, EVERYONE suddenly fell away from the Church. (Yeah, it's a LONG shot, but go with me on the mentality of the thought.) Would I be able to stand up for the things I've been taught and KNOW are true? Would I have the strength to continue on, ON my own, without any crutches to hold me up? Am I as SURE of my testimony as I should be?

After much thought, and prayer, I've come to the conclusion that yes, I can be that strong, but I must continue to cultivate and build up that foundation. I MUST! Just because I have this renewed determination doesn't mean that the path will be easy, but it's a road that I need to travel. Something that I must do, before the storms of temptation, doubt, and hopelessness come. It's like the song, "The Wise Man and the Foolish Man." I MUST build my house on the rock, so that when the rains come down, and the floods come up, my house on the rock will stay firm!