Today's post is a bunch of thoughts thrown together into one...please forgive the HUGENESS of this post! I just have a lot to say, and I don't want to post more than once a day...if I don't have to! So begins my jumbled mess...
I started a book the other day...yesterday I finished it. Yes, I know...I have no life! It was one read that I HIGHLY recommend! It's called Stolen Innocence: The Jan Broberg Story by Mary Ann Broberg. Usually I'm one for fluff books and non-thinking books. I love the stuff, but I was watching KBYU the other day and the speaker recommended a book, and since my mom has her own library I decided to raid her stash to see if she had it. I was looking and looking for the book, but had no such luck (I still want to read that one too...) But while I was rummaging around I came across this book. I skimmed the back cover and noticed a picture of the author and her daughter. I had the weirdest feeling that I knew the daughter from somewhere, so I figured, "What's the harm in reading this...if I don't like it, I just won't finish it." I started and found that I couldn't put the thing down.
I learned SO much from this book. It's the true story of a mother, her daughter and the slime of a man who kidnapped the daughter twice! It talks about a pedophile who brainwashed a little girl into thinking that what she was doing was right and that he was a wonderful person. On one hand it scared me. I can't even fathom some creep coming up with these CRAZY ideas...on the other I was fascinated with how the parents handled everything. I hope that I NEVER have to go through this situation, but if I do, I'm better educated and know what is right and what is NOT!
Today we had a mini family vacation, in our own back yard! (Well, not literally, but close enough!) We had decided that for my husband's "weekend" from work we'd do some family bonding. So today we decided to go to the local zoo and have a picnic. We had a ball! It wasn't nearly as hot as it was yesterday, so the weather cooperated with us and it was so nice to just hang out as a family! One of my other friends went yesterday, and thanks to her I got the heads up on what was new. There were SEVERAL new babies in the exhibits and we had fun trying to find them. We went through the ENTIRE zoo in about an hour and a half. Cam kept dragging us around from exhibit to exhibit. His absolute FAVORITE was the monkey house. There were these gibbons (we call them monkeys) and one was just thoroughly entertained by the people watching him...I actually felt like we were the ones on display for him! Anyway, he would swing from perch to perch and he liked to rub up against the glass and scare little kids. He was hilarious. I think if I were a monkey I'd do the same thing! But we had fun.
We ended up watching an animal thing where they brought the animals to us and let us see them. We thought it would be fun, until we heard that it was a special REPTILE thing. YUCK! I despise creepy crawlies, and snakes and lizards definitely fall into that category! They brought around a gecko and that was fine, it was still in the cage, but then they brought out the snakes....yes, TWO SNAKES!! They allowed anyone to pet the snakes if they wanted to and my son, the kid who freaks out over fluffy things flying through the air...the same kid who asks if there are spiders in our house...the very same kid who wants to know if there are snakes in every body of water we come across....THAT kid pet the snake! I was grossly proud and disgusted at the same time!
On the way out of the zoo, they have you exit through their gift shop. And of course, we're suckers for cutsie shirts and toys, so we spent extra moolah to please our already happy son. He got one of those monkey toys where the hands velcro together and they can hang from things. It looked a lot like the gibbon that entertained us so well. So the whole ride home our back seat was filled with screeches and howling. Needless to say, we had fun!
Then we ended up going to a local antique mall and browsed and dreamed. There were some really cute things there. I didn't think we'd be there that long, but I was wrong. We stayed there for over an hour. Then I wanted to try a local restaurant that is a throw-back to the 50's diner days. It was SO cute, but SO expensive. All in all, our day was fun! We laughed and enjoyed our time together in our own hometown.
One more topic I wish to cover before I leave for the night....Yesterday, my friend "L," who just had her baby and who's little girl I babysit, called and asked us a favor. They wanted to go down to the temple visitor's center and watch a movie. They didn't think that their daughter would be able to handle it, so they asked us if we could watch her for a couple of hours. They were going to take the baby...hoping he'd sleep through it, but they wanted to leave little "L" with us. I don't know what it was about that request, but it just made me feel like they were taking advantage of us. I've been watching little L off and on for a while, when they have doctor appointments and such, but this time I felt like they should take little L with them. They have her in church and she does fine...why can't they take her to this?? I guess I was just upset. How can I tell her that I don't want to watch their daughter any time they want some alone time? I just felt a little like a doormat. Don't get me wrong, I love them and want to help them, but this time I felt like it was a bit too much to ask. What should I say to her??
I learned SO much from this book. It's the true story of a mother, her daughter and the slime of a man who kidnapped the daughter twice! It talks about a pedophile who brainwashed a little girl into thinking that what she was doing was right and that he was a wonderful person. On one hand it scared me. I can't even fathom some creep coming up with these CRAZY ideas...on the other I was fascinated with how the parents handled everything. I hope that I NEVER have to go through this situation, but if I do, I'm better educated and know what is right and what is NOT!
Today we had a mini family vacation, in our own back yard! (Well, not literally, but close enough!) We had decided that for my husband's "weekend" from work we'd do some family bonding. So today we decided to go to the local zoo and have a picnic. We had a ball! It wasn't nearly as hot as it was yesterday, so the weather cooperated with us and it was so nice to just hang out as a family! One of my other friends went yesterday, and thanks to her I got the heads up on what was new. There were SEVERAL new babies in the exhibits and we had fun trying to find them. We went through the ENTIRE zoo in about an hour and a half. Cam kept dragging us around from exhibit to exhibit. His absolute FAVORITE was the monkey house. There were these gibbons (we call them monkeys) and one was just thoroughly entertained by the people watching him...I actually felt like we were the ones on display for him! Anyway, he would swing from perch to perch and he liked to rub up against the glass and scare little kids. He was hilarious. I think if I were a monkey I'd do the same thing! But we had fun.
We ended up watching an animal thing where they brought the animals to us and let us see them. We thought it would be fun, until we heard that it was a special REPTILE thing. YUCK! I despise creepy crawlies, and snakes and lizards definitely fall into that category! They brought around a gecko and that was fine, it was still in the cage, but then they brought out the snakes....yes, TWO SNAKES!! They allowed anyone to pet the snakes if they wanted to and my son, the kid who freaks out over fluffy things flying through the air...the same kid who asks if there are spiders in our house...the very same kid who wants to know if there are snakes in every body of water we come across....THAT kid pet the snake! I was grossly proud and disgusted at the same time!
On the way out of the zoo, they have you exit through their gift shop. And of course, we're suckers for cutsie shirts and toys, so we spent extra moolah to please our already happy son. He got one of those monkey toys where the hands velcro together and they can hang from things. It looked a lot like the gibbon that entertained us so well. So the whole ride home our back seat was filled with screeches and howling. Needless to say, we had fun!
Then we ended up going to a local antique mall and browsed and dreamed. There were some really cute things there. I didn't think we'd be there that long, but I was wrong. We stayed there for over an hour. Then I wanted to try a local restaurant that is a throw-back to the 50's diner days. It was SO cute, but SO expensive. All in all, our day was fun! We laughed and enjoyed our time together in our own hometown.
One more topic I wish to cover before I leave for the night....Yesterday, my friend "L," who just had her baby and who's little girl I babysit, called and asked us a favor. They wanted to go down to the temple visitor's center and watch a movie. They didn't think that their daughter would be able to handle it, so they asked us if we could watch her for a couple of hours. They were going to take the baby...hoping he'd sleep through it, but they wanted to leave little "L" with us. I don't know what it was about that request, but it just made me feel like they were taking advantage of us. I've been watching little L off and on for a while, when they have doctor appointments and such, but this time I felt like they should take little L with them. They have her in church and she does fine...why can't they take her to this?? I guess I was just upset. How can I tell her that I don't want to watch their daughter any time they want some alone time? I just felt a little like a doormat. Don't get me wrong, I love them and want to help them, but this time I felt like it was a bit too much to ask. What should I say to her??
6 comments:
ooohhh...I am sooo glad you got to go to the zoo! I LOVED it the day before...and it is SOOOOO wroth the 4.50 a person it costs to get in! They have really done a lot with what little resources they have! I was not a sucker for the gift shop stuff...but I am sure that Matthew would bend over backward to play with cams monkey! The kid LOVEs monkeys...and...I call him a monkey every morning when I see him for the first time!
I still think that we should do something like go to the zoo together sometime soon!
"As for the other...you are so right not to want to watch little L every tome they have a whim to be alone...although I would not take Matthew to the movie with useither. He is just terrible in places like that (I suspect it is because the lights are out and he thinks it is sooo fun to play around in the dark). Even if little L is the same way in theaters...if she wants you to watch her for stuff like that...YOU DESERVE TO GET PAID just like they would have to pay any other babysitter on the planet! They need to take responsibility for thieir own kids!
If it were just once every couple of months...I would probably do it as a favor...if they were going to the temple ... favors are appropriate ... but for times when it is just for their convenience ... either you could tell her that you are not a free babysitter, or that you are not available for watching her. Or...you could suck it up and watch her for free...I talk big...but actions are really a lot harder to follow through on than words are.. Good luck!
I totally here you on babysitting like that! Somedays I feel like a daycare center. Out of the kindness of my heart I offered to watch my niece for fifteen minutes a day while my BIL goes to work and my SIL gets off of work. That was all it was supposed to be. Now its, extra time here, extra time there, all day here, all day there. Its getting to the point where I'm about to tell them to find a real day care center.
Sorry about that rant! I'm glad you guys had fun at the Zoo! The monkey's are my favorite too!
Sometimes I worry about forking my kid off on his grandmother too much, so I try to avoid it except for special occasions. Most of the time she's happy to have Kyle because it gives her a break from sewing. (My mother in law is nuts; she works full time as a teacher and then works all night sewing period costumes.)
Um, I did have a point to make! What I mean to say is that I'd rather know if I was bothering her than worry about it all the time. Setting boundaries is good so everybody knows what their options are rather than testing whether or not "this" is far enough.
So go talk to your friend about what you find acceptable for babysitting.
Sorry about the double post.
Wow. What a perdicament you are in! I would give you some advice, but I know it's much better said than done. I am the same way you are... I hate confronting people in awkward situations. If I were you, I'd probably just dodge her the way you have been.... but eventually I'd realize that wasn't helping anyone, and maybe have a guilt-laden talk with her (if something drastically bad didn't happen first). So, to save all the trouble, the best bet is for you to just tell her what's on your mind from the get-go. That way, it would save a bunch of trouble. Be kind about it, but firm in your standing. We back bone-less people have gotta start standing up for ourselves! Good luck!
By the way, I went to the zoo yesterday too. There must be zoo fever in the air or something. I didn't take too many pictures, but I did get a few. Jasmine had fun, as always. Tyler was getting a little peeved from being strapped in his stroller. After about an hour or so, we started getting dumped on with a bunch of rain, so we zoomed on outa there. Jazz was bummed that we didn't get to see the elephants or the polar bears this time around, but that'the glory in having a year-round pass. We can go as many times as we want, and still go back for more!
"I'm sorry, I just can't tonight... It's not a good night..." usually works, particularly if you use it several times in a row. She doesn't need to know why or what you're doing (because people like this can usually think of reasons why you should STILL watch their kid, even if you are going in for surgery the next day). If you have a hard time saying it, paste it on the wall next to the phone and practice.
I've been in this situation too. We're just TOO NICE!! :)
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