This Week in 1997...

Since I woke up this morning I've felt a bit nostalgic. There were MANY things that had happened in my life 10 short years ago:

My gall bladder attacks began. It was one of the most miserable weeks of my life. They did all sorts of tests on me to see exactly what was going on, and their conclusion? Your gall bladder miss-fires. Well, thank you VERY much physicians of my hospital! :P

The second big thing was I was graduating from high school. It was a crazy week filled with baccalaureate, seminary graduation, trips to Lagoon, graduation practices, graduation, all-night parties....SO much fun. The weirdest thing that happened at our graduation was when the boy sitting next to me doubled over in his seat. Suddenly I heard a whooshing of air. The DORK was blowing up beach balls to toss around the graduating class. He had a few of them, but in the end a teacher ended up confiscating them. SHEESH! It's our graduation...let us enjoy it!

The third thing that has me remembering 1997 is this is the 10th anniversary of a dear friend's death. Earlier, before my gall bladder episodes, before my graduation STUFF, Colleen had been in a REALLY bad car accident. She was driving on the highway to her last day of work before she was to quit and start a new job. See, she had been commuting to Ricks college, and was working at Kmart. After her first semester at Ricks she had told me that she HATED it there, and she was going to transfer to ISU.

At this point in my life, I had just started my own first job, at Kmart, and was preparing to commute to Ricks for my first year there. Looking back, I see similarities that make me wonder if I shouldn't have just taken her lead. (I ended up hating Ricks and dropped out to transfer to ISU...)

Anyway, while she was driving, a man in a HUGE pick-up truck pulled out onto the highway without looking and crashed into her little car. She was taken to the hospital, and ended up in a coma. I had gone with my mom to visit her while she was in her coma, but our names weren't on the visitor's list at the hospital. So we sat out in the ICU waiting room to talk to her parents. I remember thinking about my mortality and praying really hard that Colleen would make it. In my mind I thought that if I prayed hard enough, I could make her better.

Well, the week of my graduation she died after 10 days in a coma. It was SO hard. She was so young, and had SO much life in her.

She had been one of the friends involuntarily involved in my rubba undies schemes as a child. She and my friend's sister had been the unknowing victims of invisible rubber underwear snaps. The thing I remember about meeting her for the FIRST time was her bubbly personality. She had told me that her initials spelled out CAR. From this tidbit, I knew that she was smart, and I wanted to be like her. She often joked that she wanted to marry a guy with a last name that started with "S" so she could be CARS. But she never got the chance.

When I found out I was pregnant with Cameron, I decided that if I had a little girl, I was going to give her Colleen's middle name as a tribute. I thought it would be fun to give MY little girl initials that spelled out a simple word. (If Cam HAD been a girl, his initials would have been JAR!)

I miss her. I know that she's in a better place, but I never got the chance to tell her how much I loved having her as a friend. I never got to say good bye.
I have since visited her grave every year, and slowly rub my hand along her headstone. I think in my heart I have said good bye, but with friends, is there ever a true farewell?