Internal Language.....and Other Things to Think About

So my Girls' Weekend Out was FANTABULOUS! The theme of the trip was "You are Beautiful." I'm SO glad that it was, I really needed it (as well as a few others of us.)

On Saturday we all took a class that was entitled "You are Beautiful," and it was taught by 4 LOVELY ladies, who I look up to. One of them talked about changing your internal language to positive thoughts. She talked about her own personal journey, and encouraged the rest of us to do the same.

She talked about sitting on a rock for 4 hours and contemplating who we are....I hope to do this sometime soon.

She said that when we're having particularly negative thoughts, to write them on our hand (the negative on the left hand and the positive on the right.) Then we can choose which one we want to keep in our mind.

And she talked about figuring out our own personal internal sentence that defines who we are and make it something positive if it's negative. I have come back to this many times since she first brought it up. My first thought was to find my negative sentence, and I found it pretty quickly. It isn't necessarily something that I always entertain, but when someone sincerely compliments me and my first thought is negative, THIS is the sentence that comes first: "I'm fat, and fat is ugly."

I know, pretty harsh, right?

So then I was thinking about what I wanted my positive sentence to be, and realized that I already have one. On my happier, and more positive days I have a sentence that I think when someone compliments me: "I'm happy to be me, and I will not accept your criticisms."

I was pleased to know that I DO have some positive things to combat all those negative voices that sneak in.

That night we were having a special testimony meeting, and one of my most favorite people got up and talked about something that I've come to LOVE! She said that we needed to think about a woman we know who has the traits that we look up to and list them. She asked us to think of four traits (because that's her lucky number....) then she gave us time to think. I thought of a wonderful woman in my ward, one I love and have actually told that I want to be like her. My four traits for her were: 1. She's a happy woman. 2. She is confident. 3. She is hilarious (she ALWAYS makes me laugh.) And 4. She is kind.

After we'd thought about our traits, my friend said that those traits we listed are things that we have within ourselves. We can recognize them because they are apart of us. They resonate through our whole lives.

After hearing this thought, I realized that it was true...not necessarily at all times, but those ARE who I am.

My weekend taught me SO much about myself, and how to truly love others that I had misjudged. I want this feeling with me ALWAYS.....

Deep Thought

I read this thought and LOVE it!! I must remember it when I'm blindly judging others.

"Everybody is a genius. But, if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing it is stupid." ~Albert Einstein

A Few of My New Favorite Quotes

I've been collecting quotes lately. Here are a few that make me happy and remind me to be a better me.

"Listen earnestly to anything [your children] want to tell you, no matter what. If you don't listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, they won't tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them, all of it has always been the big stuff."

~Catherine M. Wallace

"That which we persist in doing becomes easy to do; not that the nature of the thing has changed, but the power to do has increased."
~Heber J. Grant

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us."

~Helen Keller

"Don't' sweat the small stuff, what doesn't matter, doesn't matter."

"Laugh everyday; even if it is at yourself."

"It would be a nice world to live in if everyone made this pledge: 'I resolve to speak ill of no man whatever, not even in a matter of truth; but rather by some means excuse the faults I hear charged upon others, and upon proper occasions speak all the good I know of everybody.'"

~Benjamin Franklin

"Love like there is no tomorrow."

Borrowing Others' Words

After watching this video, I've been thinking about how much I completely AGREE with it. I hope you watch it and enjoy it too.

Positive Thoughts from a Prophet

For anyone feeling overwhelmed or frustrated with life, a few words:

"My dear sisters, do not pray for tasks equal to your abilities, but pray for abilities equal to your tasks. Then the performance of your tasks will not be a miracle, but YOU will be the miracle."

~Thomas S. Monson

BE the miracle!!

I Could NEVER Be Miss America

Well, aside from the OBVIOUS reasons (I'm not a "Miss" anymore, I don't have the beauty pageant looks, I'm WAY too old....) I realized that I could NEVER be Miss America.

Over the weekend, while watching the show (LOVE the show...it's just so fun to watch...) I was getting caught up in the excitement. Rooting for the one I felt most represented me. During the question and answer portion (which is a WHOPPING 30% of the total score, the announcers remind us...) I was fascinated with how the girls changed around any uncomfortable questions, and turned them back to, "If you make me Miss America, then I would...." I believe world peace was up for grabs....

One of the questions was SO odd to me, that it was THEN that I truly realized I could NOT be Miss America, who is full of grace and tact....

This year's questions came from the public. No doctored questions from high falutin' judges, the PEOPLE on the street, or the strip, as they were in Vegas asked the questions...

The question that got me? "The United States of America is the fore-runner among the countries of the world for donating money and resources to the victims of the Haiti earthquake. Do you think it's a good thing to be doing in this economy?"

*waiting for the stunned silence*

The contestant who had that question again, did the Miss America thing. She kept the answer "status quo" and didn't make waves.

My immediate thought, "ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME!? Why WOULDN'T our country give to those who are suffering and IN need. Just because you live in one of the richest countries in the world, you have a home and food, boo hoo, you have to use welfare, but hey, you HAVE welfare available to you....why CAN'T we help? You know, if you think they're ROLLING in the money and donations so much, why don't you go live there?!"

Yeah, see, I'd lose.

Musings....

Lately, I've been thinking about another baby. Not that I'm announcing anything...heck, I am NOT announcing anything. I've been thinking about how I would love to try for a little girl, but every time I think of another baby in my family, it's a boy (in my mind.) I would love love LOVE to get pregnant again soon, but at the same time, I'm wondering if I should just be done with the whole thing.

Here's my thoughts. I'm very happy and content with the two boys I have. I have been blessed beyond measure to have been able to be the mommy to these little guys. I realize that there are MANY who wish for the things I have, I KNOW beyond anything that I am SO SO blessed. The main thing is that I am very happy with my boys. They make me happy (most of the time) and I am pleased that they love each other and get along fairly well. The age gap is something I have to explain a lot, but it's getting better. I find that Cameron is a LOT of work, and Jake is a ball of energy. They keep me very busy and I am VERY exhausted most days.

When I think about them as teens, I realize that with my big age-gap, I will be going through those rough teen years for a VERY VERY long time. I'm not sure that I really want to throw another child in the mix to make those teen years even longer.

I'm also feeling my age a bit more these days, yes, I am not *old* but I am not quite as young as I feel like I should be either. I know I shouldn't do this, but I find myself comparing my life with my mom's. By the time she was my age, she was done having kids and had SIX of us to boot. I always imagined that by the time I was 30 I would be done having babies.

My main argument for not having more kids is the fact that I feel very blessed and I don't want to push my luck. I am content with the kids I have and I am VERY happy.

This is not to say that if I DO happen to get pregnant that I would be UNhappy....but I just don't feel the constant need to try for another child right now. Well, I lied, I don't PHYSICALLY feel the need to try for another baby, but mentally and SPIRITUALLY I feel something different.

Since Jake was a baby...I'm talking less than a month old, I've had a little spirit nag at me that they need to be a part of my family. I was really thrown when Jake was just weeks old and I was sitting by myself, counting my kids and found myself looking for the third child. That feeling has NOT gone away with time, in fact, it seems to get bigger and more prominent the further along I get.

Like I said though, I'm not sure I should press my luck, but if there IS another child (and I feel there is) then he/she better find a way to sneak in....trying to conceive is just TOO hard and TOO much work.

Stupidity of Youth...

It's forever preserved in my journals. I'm cringing just thinking about them.

I wasn't a PERFECT journal keeper, but I was pretty good about it. I would write down my EVERY desire, hope and dream. I confided my secrets there and I said exactly what I thought knowing that I wouldn't have to worry about what anyone else thought.

So knowing I could write whatever I wanted, I REALLY did.

Last week, I was having a hard time sleeping (which is actually a new thing....I can't sleep when I should...) so I pulled out my journal and read it. I figured it would help me remember all the fun things I love about Steve (since it covered the time right before I met him until about the time I started blogging...) and I realized something.....I WAS SO STUPID!

Oh, my heck. Don't say, "You're not stupid...really, you're such a nice person..." No, I was dumb. Like, naive teenager, dumb. I cannot believe that Steve decided to go on a date with me let alone fall in LOVE with me.

I thought I knew it all. I KNEW that one day I would marry ********* (fill-in-the-blank...) I just KNEW it.

Oh, gag me...please!

I guess you could call it the innocence of youth, but I just think I was plain dumb. Brain-dead...dumb.

I would share here, but I want you all to continue to think that I'm smart.

Let's just say, I'm VERY glad that over the past 10 or so years I've learned a LOT. I've grown a LOT! I've learned to rely on my family and my Heavenly Father over my friendships. (Not to say I don't have good friends, but I don't put ALL my trust in them.)

I will say that I had a ball in college. I loved my experience living in the dorms and making new friends.

Believe it or not, when I first went to college I was SUPER home-sick. I hated being on my own, and locked myself in my room crying for the first week. Eventually I learned that I didn't want to live my life like that, and I learned to like myself and to make friends with people who liked me too. After that first week, I became QUITE the little social butterfly. I went to dances, school activities...and I didn't make ANY apologies for who I was. (Although, looking back, I probably should...)

Now I've learned that I like who I am. I quite enjoy my personality (even though sometimes it CAN be a little loud and over the top) but I have also learned that I don't know NEARLY as much as I thought I knew. And that's okay.

I used to think it would be great to go back in time and re-live those days....now, with perspective, I'm happy to be where I am and WHO I am.

Book Review: The Peacegiver

I've mentioned that lately I've been having some hard times and while talking about it with some friends, one recommended that I read "The Peacegiver" by James L. Ferrell. I instantly went to my library website and put it on hold....I'm still on hold for it.
I mentioned this book to my mom, and she said, "Oh, I've got that one....you can read it. It's REALLY good."
I instantly went to find it. (Like I said, I've been having MEAN and hateful feelings....I don't like being a grump, so I've been struggling to let go of my hatred and angry attitude....but like I said, I've "struggled.") I found it and decided to read it as soon as I could.
Once I started, a change began inside of me. I instantly began to see the Atonement of Christ SO differently than I'd ever seen it before.
Let me share a few of the truths that I read in this MARVELOUS book:
The Atonement isn't just for me....Christ atoned for the sins of others. (How could this truth NOT be a "duh" moment?)
The Atonement covers completely any hurt, sin, situation of life that we may or will find ourselves in.
If we are willing to give up our grudges, hurts and pains to Christ, he will fill in the gap and make US whole. He will cover all the hurt and pain with his love and acceptance.
Loving others shouldn't be so hard. If we believe that we are all One in Christ, then we will treat those who hurt us with more care and patience than we naturally want to do.
Christ loves ALL of us completely and wholly.
This is SUCH a wonderful book. I now want this book for my own, so that I can read and re-read it over and over. I know I will fall and fail again, but knowing that the Atonement covers my every trip and fall is an amazing feeling.

Happy Thoughts

I've been going through some rough times lately, and I've been in DESPERATE search of happy, uplifting thoughts. Here are three I've come across that I'm trying to internalize and take to heart...I hope they help someone else!

***

"On my way to visit the Jameses the other evening, I saw a wheat field that appeared to be greener and taller than the others. Thinking about it for a while, I concluded that occasionally some loving farmer drives over the field with his tractor and pumps manure all over it. I thought, 'My, it's just like life. Here we are minding our own business, growing our little hearts out. We're really quite green, somewhat productive and very sincere. When out of the blue, life deals us a dirty one, and we're up to our eyebrows in manure. We, of course, conclude that life as we have known it has just ended and will never be the same again. But one day, when the smell and the shock are gone, we find ourselves greener and more productive than we have been.'

"Unfortunately, no matter how often we go through these growing experiences, we are never able to appreciate the sound of the tractor or the smell of the manure."

--Harold W. Wood

***

"On those days when we're not ready to stop being offended, not ready to forgive, still determined to dish out the silent treatment, what we're actually saying is, 'Thanks, but I don't want to become more like the Savior today. Maybe tomorrow, but not today."

--Sheri Dew

***

"Life often feels like a great pile of obligations, frustrations, and disappointments. But the Lord is there, always the same, His arms still outstretched. When we feel overwhelmed, we have to remember the peace He has spoken to us on previous occasions. His peace brings comfort and strength; the world cannot give that to us."

--Kathleen H. Hughes

Who Is In Charge?

We have a DVD/VCR in our bedroom that I use as my personal clock. (Yes, we have an alarm clock, but it's on Steve's side of the bed, and I have stopped waking HIM up to find out what time it is in the middle of the night. I think he appreciates it!) Anyway, yesterday morning I woke up to kind of a bleary day. I wasn't sure what time it was, so I looked at my trusty clock. It read 6:55. I was happy, because it felt a little later than that, and I could sleep some more!

About 20 minutes later I woke up, and it was a little brighter, so I checked my other trusty time-telling device, my watch. It said it was 8:15!!

How could it be nearly 7:00, and then 20 minutes later be 8:15?? Well, thanks to new technology, my DVD/VCR has an automatic daylight savings time changer. But.....but......

I just want to know who is in charge of daylight savings time? Who decides when it happens?? I mean, just a few years ago you KNEW daylight savings time would happen between the first Sunday in April and the last Sunday in October. But last year, someone (probably the person in charge) decided that we needed more daylight hours, so he (or she) changed it from one of the last Sundays in March to the first Sunday in November. No one told my DVD player, so it faithfully changes on the first Sunday in April and the last Sunday in October....which means I have to manually change it back!

I just want to know who I can complain to. I don't mind daylight savings time, in fact, during the summer, it's kinda nice. I do mind that they changed the regularity of the time we change it. Who decided this? When I find out who it is, I'm planning on complaining. I think it's probably too late to complain about this for next year. So my next thought was, when I complain, how soon will the change go into effect? (Seeing how I'm SOOOOOO influential! ;) ) Why can't they fix things so they're the SAME as they've always been? Or if they're going to change it, why don't they just do away with it all together?

I was wondering about who is in charge. Is there some big "Daylight Savings Time Group?" Or is someone else in charge, like some guy who lives in Greenwich, England? Does our President have a say in whether we change time or not? Why doesn't Arizona even participate?? The poopers!

So many questions, and no answers. So I'm throwing it out to cyber-space.

WHO'S IN CHARGE!?

Boobies? Yes, Boobies

I've been thinking a lot lately about my boobs. So if you don't want to read about boobs....STOP NOW!!

I'm warning you, I'm going to babble on about boobs......

Okay, so nursing this baby has been a wonderful experience. But I do have a FEW issues. My nipples (see, I'm waxing on about my boobs....seriously, STOP reading if you don't want to know....) droop. Granted, my whole boob droops, but the nipple is actually quite low on the boob. So nursing with the Boppy (which I saw on many a Baby Story or Bringing Home Baby episode) was something I tried....once. Yeah, the Boppy brought Jake up SO high that he was trying to suck on my neck. (Okay, not necessarily my neck, but you get the point.) I have to stick Jake between my legs and kind of lean him back to get him properly latched on. Then he goes to town. Now, one of my nipples is more sensitive than the other. Here's my little admission: I don't have very much feeling in my boobs. Unless you pinch or otherwise hurt it (in a HARD way) I don't feel it. A brush up against me does not phase me. But my right nipple is pretty sore a lot of the time. In fact, my whole right side is more sensitive. If Jake doesn't eat for a while, then my right shoulder blade hurts.

Jacob is also teething. This is not fun for either of us. And yes, I do realize that he's only three and a half months old, but by the time I was his age, I had 2 teeth. He definitely takes after my side of the family! He thinks it feels good to gnaw on me to make his gums feel better. I know, I know...there's no teeth there, yet, but it DOES hurt. He bites down (or gums down) and then pulls his head to the side pulling himself OFF. YEOUCH! I must preserve my nipples!! I don't want to be the weird lady, who goes to the emergency room, with a "nipple" emergency. NO, please!

I've also noticed some nasty black hairs sprouting out of my boob. I know we're mammals and have hair on our bodies, but I didn't think I'd have such gnarly hairs THERE! There have been times, when I'm exposed and nursing, that I've tried to pluck out the hairs, only to make them curly and pretty.

Now, don't get me wrong, (PLEASE) I don't dislike my boobs. In fact, I think they're quite impressive. But with October coming, I'm thinking a bit about breast cancer. I've also got a good friend who has had breast cancer and she's a survivor. She talks about friends she loses to cancer, and I can't help but think that I could be one of those women who have breast cancer. Not that I've had cancer, but it runs in my family. Both of my paternal great-grandmothers had breast cancer and both had mastectomies (one a total and one was partial.) Whenever I think to complain about my boobs, I remember that it really is a blessing to have healthy breasts. Things could be so much worse.

My one complaint about my boobs is the fact that they really (REALLY) sag. They're so droopy. Steve and I had a cute picture taken of the two of us recently, and every time I see it, I can't help but notice that my boobs look like tear drops! HOLY MOLEY!! Can't I just get a lift and a bolt? (Okay, that's what I want...not an enhancement, but a lift and then bolt those suckers in place....) I know it's possible, but hey, I can't afford it....yet. Someday my dream is to have pretty and perky boobs. Someday my dream will come true. SOMEDAY!!

Okay, enough about MY boobs....

On another random note, I'm no longer babysitting. Long story short, my friend has to quit her job because babysitting just isn't working out for her. (I was only watching one of her three kids, I couldn't handle all three....) Anyway, Kenneth will STILL come and play sometimes, but I'm done. :(

Did You Know....

There are things that I'm slowly re-learning with this baby...for those of you who are as clueless as I was, allow me to share some of my new found knowledge.

• Breast tissue extends to your back and underneath your armpits. Yeah, sore boobies are here! :P (Sometimes I just wish Jakers would drink just a little bit more!)
• Babies poop....A LOT!! I swear, I get one poopy diaper changed and there's another waiting.
• Big brothers can be helpful, sometimes TOO helpful. Cameron is always asking if he can hold his brother, I'd LOVE to let him, but most of the time when he asks when I'm being used as a human binkie!
• Sleep is a luxury. Get it while you can! (Why didn't my body allow me this luxury when I was still pregnant?!)
• Breastfeeding is wonderful....if the baby cooperates! Mr. Jakey loves to latch on and then pull off again. Super frustrating when my boobs are full and in desperate need of draining.
• I know they say babies don't smile, they "have gas," but gosh darn it....those sleeping smiles are just TOO dang cute!
• People who see your new baby will play a game I like to refer to as "Who's body parts are whose?" Most people will look at Jake and say, "Oh, my goodness, he looks just like his mama!" But we got quite the shock on Fathers' Day when one of my cousins looked at him and said, "I see STEVE!" So far, Jake has his daddy's chin, dimples, curved ears, and pretty, long eyelashes. The rest of him?? Well, the general consensus still says me.
• Socks are NOT made for baby feet. Seriously, why won't they just stay on?
• People who saw you over and over during your pregnancy will comment on how GREAT you look post-pregnancy....leaving you to wonder how seriously crappy you looked while carrying this child!

Sleep deprivation is here, but I'm still completely in love with my boys. (Yes, ALL three of them!) My family constantly competes over who gets to hold the baby, and I'm surviving....

Visitors

I love getting visitors. Lately I've had a couple of interesting visits.

A few weeks ago the Jehovah's Witnesses visited my house. It was a VERY cold morning, so I kindly let them inside to warm up a bit. These two ladies were very nice. They shared a message with me about being kinder to our loved ones. Then they left me one of their pamphlets with an article about how to keep your relationships free from arguing and stuff like that. (Okay, PLEASE don't make fun of my speech right now....I've got MAJOR preggo brain, and I just don't think well anymore!)

We had a very nice conversation, and I told them straight out that the reason I invited them inside was because I hope people will do the same thing when MY missionaries come to their home. (Yes, TACKY, TACKY, Dawnyel!)

The asked me if I was LDS, and I said I was. Then they quickly (maybe TOO quickly) packed things up and left my house. They promised they'd come back and talk with me again, but I'm not holding my breath. (Really, I've had the Jehovah's Witnesses come to my house MANY a time and they always PROMISE to come back, but they NEVER do! I must be lucky or something....)

After they left, I tried to read their article, but I didn't like the feeling of it. It seemed very argumentative in itself! :P So I put it away, and noticed that in their rush to leave they left a pencil. Yay....I scored a pencil out of the deal! ;)

That visit was nice, but they weren't the only visitors I have had lately!

Last week, almost one week from the day that the Jehovah's Witnesses visited me, I got a knock from some MORE messengers. This time it was MY missionaries.
Again, the day was cold and I invited the Elders in. Unfortunately, my husband was snoozing upstairs, and I was a lonely lady on the main floor, so they talked with me at the door.

They immediately noticed that I had a picture of Christ hanging by the door and asked me if I was a member. I told them I was, and they asked me if I knew my neighbors.

Sadly, I fear my neighborhood. My neighbors AREN'T the best people, but they can be nice. I just haven't ventured too far past my little apartment. I told them that I knew a FEW people, but not many. Then they asked me if I knew of ANYONE who might need to hear their message. Again, I was a bit ashamed and told them that whenever we have those lessons in church about being a member missionary, and praying to find those seeking truth, I never can think of a name.

Then one of the Elders, who I KNOW is barely 20 years old, stood before me and promised me that if I prayed and took the time to make a list, I would find someone who needs the missionaries. It was one of those times when I felt the Spirit confirming the words of a YOUNG man. I felt the power of his words, and I've decided to take his challenge. They joked with me a little about even if it was someone in Wyoming, they have connections.

The visit was short. Much shorter than the visit I had with the women from the week before, but it was SO much more powerful. I have no other words to describe it.

Visitors are fun. But there can be a great difference in the message they bring!

Where Has the Year Gone!?

Doesn't it just seem like it was summer?? Where did the year go? I can't believe that it's already November!! I've already seen Christmas commercials on TV!! (Not that I mind...I pretty much pull out my Christmas music as soon as Halloween is over...)

Some of Cameron's favorite questions are, "What comes next?" In his world, usually that means, "What major holiday is next?" I can't believe I'm already saying, "It's Thanksgiving and then Christmas!!" WHOA!!

I guess having time move quickly will be helpful, when my maternity days move slowly, I should remember, time moves QUICKER than I expect. I still find it hard to believe that my little boy is seven!! I don't feel old enough to have a child that old!

I guess what I'm saying is that I just find it hard to believe that this year is nearly over. In the blink of an eye, it will be NEXT year, then next summer, then next fall.....It will all move WAY too fast!!

And anyone wanting an update on my preggo situation....I'm still nauseous, but surviving. I've stocked up on anything that I've heard is helpful for morning sickness: ginger snaps, peppermint hard candies, peppermint gum, peanuts, sunflower seeds, watermelon Bubble Yum....and so far, it's ALL working!! *whew*

A World Free of Complaints

A LONG time ago I signed up to get these little purple bracelets for my family to help remind us not to complain. The idea is that when you complain, gossip, or say something that isn't nice that you take the bracelet and switch it to the opposite wrist. The goal is to have it on the same wrist for 21 consecutive days....in a way, making a new habit. Hard to do?? Yes, but it's possible!

So far, I have yet to find an HOUR when I don't need to switch my bracelet. Am I really that negative?? When I look at it I do think that I need to make more of an effort to speak kindly, and positively. It's SO hard for me! *switching the bracelet* But I can do it?? Right??

How wonderful the WHOLE world would be if we ALL could think about being more kind with our words. Hurt feelings would NOT even exist! We wouldn't be afraid to speak our minds, and when we DID speak our minds it would be with constructive advice instead of mean words.

I dream of a time when life can be like that, until then I will work on myself....

Ponder my Ponderings

What do you get when my hubby is OFF of work?!

No me online for days! (But he's back to work tonight, so no worries...I'll be back...soon....I hope!)

Smelly

I'm dying from smell overdose!!

Today I walked into the church building and was hit in the face with the smell of sweaty bodies, BO, and bad breath!! Sitting through my meetings about did me in!

And when I was outside, it was a little muggy, but the smell is what got to me. I was smelling some pretty STINKY flowers! (And there aren't any flowers by my door....at ALL!) Pyew!!

Is there something you can do about overwhelming smells?! :)

Excitement and Obsession

Here are a few thoughts running through my mind right now:

• I can't wait to get off the computer (uh...wha!?) and watch my recorded version of Heroes. It seems like every so often I become completely obsessed with a television show...this year's winner is Heroes. I can't get enough of it. I HAVE to watch each episode at least twice before watching the next one. I like watching and seeing if I can figure out the mysteries in the show. Here's a little proof at how *woo hoo* I've been over this show: Last night I was watching last week's episode, since the new one was going to be on tonight, and I had a whole 5 minutes where I froze the screen...trying to figure out Claire's dad's first name! Obsessed?? I think so!!
• I can't wait for Valentines' Day! I did my shopping today. Usually we get our tax refund around this holiday, so we go all out...it's really fun! I bought Steve a CD that he REALLY wanted, but told him that it was unavailable. He freaked out and went directly to ebay to buy it! PUNK! I can't even have ONE surprise with him!! *pout*
• I went shopping for the REST of his Valentines' Day presents at a special store. I would put on here exactly what I got him, but it's a little racy....let's just say, that night ought to be very FUN! ;)
• I need to finish filling out all of my scouting information. I have a form that I need to get all filled out before next week. I just don't wanna do it!!
• I'm still giggling at my sweet hubby. After I changed everything on my blog, he was reading the bottom...where the comments are and saw "utha luvas." He looked at me and said, "What's a 'ooothah loooovah?'" Thanks to him, I've changed it to "otha luvas."
• I finally checked my myspace account last night for the first time...probably since last year, and found 2 friend requests...one from my cousin, and the other from my younger brother. Why am I scared to say he's okay to be my friend?? Maybe because his page is exceptionally FREAKY!?
• My little town is not as safe as I had hoped. Last night there was a shooting at one of our Walmarts. How could this happen?? The really scary thing, the shooter is STILL on the loose!! I guess it's another reason to NOT shop at Walmart...especially on Sundays!
• I'm in heaven!! Nick at Nite is showing reruns of one of my all time favorite sitcoms....Growing Pains. Mike STILL makes me swoon....Ben does too, but didn't he recently come out of the closet? *sigh*
• Why is my chin super hot?? Nothing else feels this warm...Weird...
• WHY can't Blogger offer more choices of fonts?? I LOVE the new look to my blog, except for my title. I chose what I thought looked best from what they offered, but I would love, love, LOVE a pretty flowy script. Yeah, I'm weird, but I just like changing things up every so often!
• Do you pronounce the word "often" as off-en or oft-en? Hmmm.....

Inside a Rubba Undies Luva's Thoughts

Alone. That's me right now.
We signed Cameron up with the Learning Center. He went there this last summer, but we stopped sending him once school started back up. We really didn't want to overwhelm the kid, but it seems he's really needed to go. All week he's been excited about it, asking when he can go. I told him yesterday that instead of mama picking him up from school a van would come and take him to the Learning Center. He was so excited! I just hope he's not rotten for them. Lately, he's been extremely cranky in the afternoons. (Nothing like needing a nap!) So now on Fridays all I have to do with him is drop him off at school and I'm all on my own until nearly 3:00 in the afternoon. Whatever will I do with myself!?

Then, Cam's also been pulling his hair OUT of his head. Last summer he cut a patch of hair from that same spot, but now he's got a bigger bald spot, and I don't know whether to worry about it or just let it go. When I ask him why he pulls his hair out he tells me, "Cuz I wanna." Maybe he's just seeing if he can bother me. But to stop him from yanking it out I've buzzed his head...with the hopes that he can't get a good hold and make his bald spot bigger! Let's hope!

We've been having a weird occurrence here lately. Our landlord scheduled an inspection last week. I wasn't bothered by it, I think it's good that he wants to see what's going on in these apartments. But instead of just him, or his son (the repair guy) coming, it was him and a couple of guys who were looking into buying the building. Weird!

The first time this happened I didn't really think much of it, until our nosy neighbor said we were probably the only apartment that they went inside of. Then the other night we found a note on our front door from our landlord asking us to call him. We were a little curious about what he wanted, but didn't worry too much! He wanted to know if he could show our apartment to someone else the next night. We agreed, then looked at each other. Why does he like showing OUR apartment? Is it the fact that these apartments allow smoking and pets and we have neither!? We really don't know the reason, but after letting more people wander through our home last night the landlord kept thanking us over and over.

And the Groundhog predicts early spring? Yeah, right!! We'll see if THAT one comes true!!

The SuperBowl is on Sunday. Not that I LOVE football, but in our family we're all about finding ANY excuse to have a big family get together! And who doesn't love watching commercials that make them laugh!? I may just end up rooting for the Bears anyway, just to BUG Steve! ;)

Now what am I going to do? I've got an hour and a half until Cameron comes home, and I'm finished with my blog. *sigh*